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All Encompassing Haiku Contest


Since we ran out of new episodes, I haven’t been running any haiku contests. I kind of missed the little poetic fellas so let’s start one now and see how good we all can be.

The challenge? Write a Haiku with “The Office” as a subject. You can take anything from any episode…or if you’re real good you can wrap it all up in one haiku.

Ready. Set. Go.

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41 Responses to “All Encompassing Haiku Contest”

  1. davis freeberg
    June 13th, 2006 15:06
    1

    Office Love Moment
    Valentine’s Day Needs To Pass
    No I Don’t Want Kids

  2. Dude
    June 13th, 2006 15:32
    2

    Michael is inept
    Dwight is a crazy nutjob
    And yes, Jim loves Pam

  3. ssstephen
    June 13th, 2006 15:53
    3

    fire someone today
    not sure who it will be, Creed?
    Creed said devon’s gotta go

  4. ssstephen
    June 13th, 2006 16:02
    4

    A teapot for Pam
    Jokes and secrets are inside
    all revealed in time

  5. Kirsten
    June 13th, 2006 16:05
    5

    Inverted Penis
    Hot Dog Fingers and Choculitis
    No Benefits For You.

  6. ssstephen
    June 13th, 2006 16:15
    6

    Michael is insane
    he stepped on his foreman
    Dwight to the rescue

  7. ssstephen
    June 13th, 2006 16:18
    7

    Darryl and Michael
    they got a secret handshake
    and dinkin flicka’

  8. ssstephen
    June 13th, 2006 16:34
    8

    Afghanistanies
    they come before the boy scouts
    charity money

  9. Brian
    June 13th, 2006 16:46
    9

    Don’t you do it Pam
    Even your mom will say so
    Roy’s a big fat oaf

    Poor Kevin, blushing
    Anal fissures are not fake
    Now everyone knows

    Transfer? To Stamford?
    Connecticut has no Pam
    Who would torture Dwight?

  10. VIOLETA
    June 13th, 2006 16:49
    10

    Downsize is scary
    Wish I could fire Sherry
    I’m still here Michael
    (Halloween)

  11. oficefan
    June 13th, 2006 16:51
    11

    this is just a random post but i was wondering if anyone else has found any contradicting events happening in episodes of the office. i have two that i can think of off the top of my head
    1. In ‘Basketball’ jim says how basketball was his thing in high school. in ‘Email Survailence, we find out Jim was dorky in High School.
    2. In ‘The Client’ they are discussing their worst first date. Oscar says tells a story about his girlfriend. In ‘The Secret’ we find out he has a boyfriend and is secretly gay.

  12. VIOLETA
    June 13th, 2006 16:52
    12

    everybody hurts
    we didnt start the fire
    mambo number five
    (the fire)

  13. Brian
    June 13th, 2006 17:05
    13

    I apologize for the triple post. I was inspired.

  14. VIOLETA
    June 13th, 2006 18:04
    14

    rule 5: safety first
    toaster oven 101
    was it worth it temp?

    Oscar would do Pam
    Question: Is there firewood?
    Stanley, take over

  15. srah
    June 13th, 2006 18:07
    15

    In ‘Basketball’ jim says how basketball was his thing in high school. in ‘Email Survailence, we find out Jim was dorky in High School.

    I wouldn’t say that high school basketball and dorkiness are mutually exclusive.

    In ‘The Client’ they are discussing their worst first date. Oscar says tells a story about his girlfriend. In ‘The Secret’ we find out he has a boyfriend and is secretly gay.

    He may not have come out for a while, or may not have realized he was gay until later in his life.

    My sister mentioned today that Angela said at some point that she’s a vegetarian and that Dwight wanted to give her a ham as a gift. That’s a bit of a contradiction, too…

  16. VIOLETA
    June 13th, 2006 18:16
    16

    one of my favorite moments from The Client!!

    Pimps drive cheap escorts,
    Proctologists drive brown probes,
    Vodka-tonic please!

    and

    Dinner and a show
    Not a date if Pam goes home…
    with her fiance

    “Threat Level Midnight”
    Michael’s movie? 2 Thumbs down
    breif intermission

    Agent Micheal Scarn
    Samuel L. Chang is “Dwigt”
    Jan’s Catherine-Zeta

  17. VIOLETA
    June 13th, 2006 18:18
    17

    what about kevin?
    i would have sex with ryan
    definately jim

    from the fire

  18. VIOLETA
    June 13th, 2006 18:22
    18

    contradictions…
    oscar admits he would do pam (the fire)but is supposedly gay (even though he speaks of his worst first date with a women in the client and wears a dress in Halloween)
    dwight says he’s never been sick (health care) but states he’d never missed a day of work even when he had walking pnemonia (performance reviews)

  19. J
    June 13th, 2006 19:11
    19

    jim and pam are cute
    roy tells pam to sleep in car
    michael annoys pam

  20. Brian
    June 14th, 2006 04:50
    20

    September’s far off
    Reruns won’t work much longer
    “Office” withdrawal sucks

  21. ViPixiequeen
    June 14th, 2006 05:12
    21

    good one brian!!!

  22. Scott
    June 14th, 2006 06:01
    22

    At first they were friends
    She was engaged afterall
    Poor Roy… Pam loves Jim!

  23. Ed
    June 14th, 2006 06:17
    23

    Ok…where is my desk?
    Ryan Started the Fire!
    Can I Fire Jim?

  24. Sara
    June 14th, 2006 08:28
    24

    I’m early voting for #4

  25. Kristin
    June 14th, 2006 10:31
    25

    Just another contradiction: How about Dwight never having been sick, but having green urine for his last urinalysis?

    “Keep an eye on her, Halpert”
    Sweater boy says, “Will do.”
    A screen-lit pure kiss.

    Jim’s flirted for months
    Playing his card right
    Will Roy have to Fold?

    Can one kiss make up
    For missed opportunity
    on the booze cruise deck?

    Sorry, got carried away

  26. Anonymous
    June 14th, 2006 10:39
    26

    Are we voting on these? If so, disqualifying my own, I’ll vote for #5. The last line reminds me of the soup nazi.

    Inverted Penis
    Hot Dog Fingers and Choculitis
    No Benefits For You.

  27. Brian
    June 14th, 2006 10:39
    27

    Are we voting on these? If so, disqualifying my own, I’ll vote for #5. The last line reminds me of the soup nazi.

    Inverted Penis
    Hot Dog Fingers and Choculitis
    No Benefits For You.

  28. Kristina
    June 14th, 2006 12:21
    28

    Sorry, O/T, but another contradiction is in The Fire, Dwight tells Ryan (in front of Michael) that Michael didn’t even go to college, but in Email Surveillance, Michael eats his ramen noodle soup and talks about his college days.

    From Take Your Daughter to Work Day:

    Don’t anger Stanley
    Sniffin’ around his daughter
    Jesus can’t help you

    Edward R. Meow
    Even cats pity Michael
    Little Kid Lover

    Email Surveillance:

    Birkenstocks in car
    In case of make-out session
    Jim has a love shack

    Improv comedy
    Must always start with a gun
    Agent Michael Scarn

    Christmas Party:

    On nasty Christmas
    I care an oven mitt’s worth
    Some people like these

  29. Lauren
    June 14th, 2006 14:29
    29

    Work sucks, boring life
    But Thursdays make it awesome
    Hmm…not a bad day.

    JimandPam at last
    The Office gets some Emmys
    Dreams can come true, right?

  30. proudgirl
    June 14th, 2006 16:00
    30

    On Jim/Pam Casino Night:

    What are you doing?
    I just needed you to know:
    I’m in love with you.

  31. Three Hole Punch Linz
    June 14th, 2006 16:59
    31

    Boss thinks he’s funny.
    Assistant To The is nuts.
    Jam kiss in the end.

    I suck at these.

  32. VI
    June 14th, 2006 17:04
    32

    Jim as Michael Scott
    “nay, exceed expectations…”
    Long distance high-five

    Dunder-Mifflin Man
    3 Hole Punch version of Jim
    What are you, a monk?

    Brownie Sabotage
    toothbrushes…pennies…walnuts…
    Halloweens ruined

    Jim brings in money,
    Fire the least popular
    No Michael, NOT DWIGHT!!!

    (halloween)

  33. DwightK
    June 14th, 2006 18:04
    33

    No cancer for Kev
    Michael is confused - Since when
    is “negative” good?
    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    (michael:)

    I’m an early bird
    and I am a night owl, so
    I’m wise and have worms

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    Pam will get married.
    On June the 10th I will cry.
    Damn you, Roy. Damn you.

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++

    Dwight K Shrute is
    - middle name
    Danger (Purple Belt)

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++

    Jan Levinson (Gould?)
    Hooks up with Michael. Mistake.
    What were you thinking?

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++

    Angela - Likes Dwight,
    and likes posters of babies.
    That just freaks me out

    ====================

    Okay, I’m new to this. So welcome me as one of your own. I love the office. Does anyone know how long it can stay on YouTube? Will it get taken down, or is it our source for continual reruns of the show forever?

    DwightKSchrute

  34. Sarah
    June 15th, 2006 03:17
    34

    Jim, who would you do?
    Pam looks nervous and hopeful
    Kevin? Nice save Jim!

  35. Sarah
    June 15th, 2006 03:25
    35

    Why watch The Office?
    Dunder Mifflin is a home
    for paper and fun!

  36. Rick
    June 15th, 2006 12:07
    36

    Micheal is the boss
    But he does not have a clue
    what anyone else does

  37. Rick
    June 15th, 2006 12:17
    37

    2 more:

    Jim is the man who
    Every woman dreams about
    Why can’t we be you?

    Dwight rules the work place
    Purple belts, beat farms, suck up
    Cocks in the hen house

  38. DwightK
    June 15th, 2006 15:14
    38

    Ryan is the temp.
    He (might) still have a future
    Get out of there, quick.
    ——————
    Dwight has a farm house.
    Teenagers use it for sex.
    I hope he doesn’t.
    ——————
    Dwight and Angela.
    They have a secret romance.
    Their kids would be WEIRD.
    ——————
    Alternative Names:
    Michael Scott is Agent Scarne
    Samuel Chang - “Dwigt”

    More from DwightK

  39. DwightK
    June 21st, 2006 20:24
    39

    These Haikus - they’re done?
    No one’s writing any more.
    Do we pick winners?

    ————
    DwightK

  40. alex
    April 7th, 2007 05:06
    40

    Anyway as to my last comment i can only think that we are getting to deep into this and a change of subject would do us all good just my 10 cents worth.

  41. Jakob
    July 5th, 2007 06:05
    41

    This is exactly what I expected to find out after reading the title All Encompassing Haiku Contest. Thanks for informative article

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